I’ve tried. I’ve done my best. I’ve attempted to stay upbeat and positive and aside from the occasional mocking of people who refuse to understand time (“Computer Greeks Opens at 10am”- is secret code for “Computer Greeks Opens at 10am”) or don’t believe a locked door is really locked, so pulling on it multiple times makes complete sense, or think that wearing a mask is a Communist plot to subvert the very foundations of Liberty, I think I have done a reasonable job overall.
But this Thursday morning I am not in a good mood.
It’s too early, I’m too tired, and I’m four days into trying to eat better so I haven’t had a single chip or any candy or the Choc-Tacos that my wife decided to buy for Taco Tuesday that have been calling out to me for days, so be warned.
Today, I’m focusing on the things that (to steal from the Simpsons) “Grind My Gears”.
Big things, little things, weird things that probably only bother me are all you are going to get today, so if you stopped by hoping to be uplifted and inspired, you can reread one of my earlier posts or go watch Bob Ross paint something instead.
Why is it that eating healthy is important, but you can get 2 burgers for $2 and a salad is $19.95?
What’s with all the damn pillows on couches that are never used and just take up space making it harder to find a place to sit? Couch Decorations?
The absurd number of Spam Calls I get on my Cell Phone! Makes me so mad I start to wish someone would just choke on a grape and then feel guilty for wanting a stranger to injure themselves.
People!
Family!
Using too many Exclamation Points!!!
Someone not knowing the difference between Their, They’re, and There!
Needing a pen cap to line up with the writing on the pen!
Being tired all day and then not being able to get to sleep at night!
The guy who called the store Tuesday with a problem that he wanted fixed over the phone because the last time he had a problem someone helped him fix it over the phone so now that’s just the expectation and then telling me “He’s Very Unhappy” because I told him this couldn’t be fixed over the phone and he would need to bring it in and now he wants to return a computer he bought a year ago because it couldn’t be fixed over the phone!
When you can find the sequel to a movie you want to watch but not the original!
Needing a translator to decipher the sizes of Coffee at Starbucks!
People who don’t eat the pieces at the bottom of a Pringles Can and set it out to be recycled! (My son knows exactly who I’m talking about).
People who put dishes with food still on them in the sink without cleaning them off! (Guess Who?)
The people working at my Subway- they couldn’t act any more irritated that you came into their store if they tried! Why?
The Teletubbies!
All of the Movies that are just remakes of Old Movies! Get an original thought people!
Autocorrect on my phone! You think you know better than I do? Well join the club along with literally everyone else I know!
People who are so negative!
Allspice! You can’t actually be All Spices!
My $170 a month water bill! Thanks a lot Illinois American Water!
Sarcasm!
All Bills! I deserve more free stuff!
Entitled People!
Getting Old!
The kid who kicks the back of your seat on the plane!
The phrase “I could care less”! Me too.
“For all Intensive Purposes”, “Escape Goat”, “Hunger Pains”, “Biting My Time”- Wrong again!
People using speaker on a phone call in public!
Opening the cans of Crescent Rolls! It scares me!
The wait time for a Doctor’s Appointment! Learn to Schedule Properly!
Non-stick pans! Lies, all Lies!
Covid-19!
Having your kids get the Johnson and Johnson vaccine the day before they put it on hold because of people dying from Blood Clots! For Real!
Wars!
Dog Farts!
Internet Ads!
People with icons filling their entire computer desktop!
People using the 10 items or less lane with way more than 10 items!
PEOPLE WHO TEXT OR EMAIL IN ALL CAPS!
Not replacing the toilet paper roll with 1 sheet on it!
Having to wear glasses! They fog up with a mask constantly!
Identity Theft!
Car Alarms! No one cares!
Slow Internet!
Setting the TV Volume to an Odd Number!
People who don't go to Computer Greeks located at 12222 S Harlem Ave in Palos Heights and Open Monday-Saturday from 10am to 6pm!
The absurd number of Hallmark Movies that involve a girl getting amnesia in a car accident and then being taken in by the small town Doctor/Vet who apparently doesn’t need to run any tests on someone who obviously has severe head trauma! Malpractice Anyone?
Lists of things that go on far longer than they should have!
I will now allow you to go back to your regularly scheduled lives and I will do my best to ensure that my next “Thoughts for Thursday” are significantly less negative.
But no promises…
Stay Safe and Stay Well- Uncle Steve
Comments